英语幽默笑话小故事

英语幽默笑话小故事

英语幽默笑话小故事一：

　Very Pleased to Meet YouDuring World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers. One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I'm going abroad tomorrow, but I'd be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months. Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England. Joan went there and said to the matron, "I've come to visit Captain Humphreys." "Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said. "Oh, that's all right," answered Joan. "I'm his sister." "I'm very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I'm his mother!"

　 英语幽默笑话小故事二：

　Two SoldiersTwo soldiers were in camp. The first one's name was George, and the second one's name was Bill. George said, "have you got a piece of paper and an envelope, Bill?" Bill said, "Yes, I have," and he gave them to him. Then George said, "Now I haven't got a pen." Bill gave him his, and George wrote his letter. Then he put it in the envelope and said, "have you got a stamp, Bill?" Bill gave him one. Then Bill got up and went to the door, so George said to him, "Are you going out?" Bill Said, "Yes, I am," and he opened the door. George said, "Please put my letter in the box in the office, and..." He stopped. "What do you want now?" Bill said to him. George looked at the envelope of his letter and answered, "What's your girl-friend's address?"

　 英语幽默笑话小故事三：

　est Point My father, brother and I visited West Point to see a football game between Army and Boston College. Taking a stroll before kickoff, we met many cadets in neatly pressed uniforms. Several visting fans asked the recruits if they would pose for photographs, "to show our son what to expect if he should attend West Point." One middle-aged couple approached a very attractive female cadet and asked her to pose for a picture. They explained, "We want to show our son what he missed by not coming to West Point."

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一分钟英语小故事演讲稿

英语寓言小故事（一）： A mouse once took a bite out of a bull's tail as he lay dozing。 The bull jumped up in a rage and， with his head low to the ground， chased the mouse right across the yard。 The mouse was too quick for him， however， and slipped easily into a hole in the wall。

　The bull charged the wall furiously again and again， but although he bruised his head and chipped his horns， the mouse stayed safely inside his hole。 After a time the bull gave up and sank down to rest again。

　As soon as the bull was asleep， the little mouse crept to the mouth of the hole， pattered across the yard， bit the bull again -- this time on the nose -- and rushed back to safety。 As the bull roared helplessly the mouse squeaked:

　It's not always the big people who e off best。 Sometimes the small ones win， you know。

　老鼠和公牛

　有一次，公牛躺着打盹，一只老鼠咬了他的尾巴。公牛怒气冲冲地跳起来，低着头追老鼠，一向追过院子。然而，老鼠跑得比他快多了，从容地钻到墙洞里去了。

　公牛一次又一次地猛撞墙壁，尽管头撞肿了，角撞裂了，老鼠却安然待在洞里。过了一会儿，公牛不撞了，倒下歇着。

　公牛刚睡着，小老鼠就爬到洞口，嗒嗒地跑过院子，又咬了公牛一口?这回咬了鼻子?又跑回安全的地方去。当公牛毫无办法地吼叫时，老鼠吱吱叫道：

　大人物并不总占上风。有时小人物也会取胜。

　英语寓言小故事（二）：

　On a vacation trip， Duke Huan of the state of Qi came to the ruin of the capital of Guo Shi ， which perished long ago。

　Seeing the desolate and bleak prospects of broken tiles， collapsed walls， and clusters of weeds， he could not help asking the local people about the reason of the ruin of Guo Shi。

　They replied，Guo Shi was fond of doing good deeds， and averse to evildoing， which led to the perdition。

　When the Duke could not understand the answer， people explained ， Though he liked doing good， he had never been able to do so; though he hated evildoing， never could he help not participating。 That caused the ruin of his capital。

　郭氏之墟

　齐桓公出游途中，来到已经灭亡许久的郭氏都城的废墟。

　看到瓦砾残垣、杂草丛生的萧条景象，忍不住问当地百姓郭氏灭亡的原因。

　百姓们回答说：郭氏由于喜爱善行善事。厌恶邪恶丑行而导致灭亡。

　齐桓公不能理解这种回答，百姓们便解释说：郭氏虽然喜爱善行善事，但从来都不能做到;尽管厌恶邪恶丑行，却总是忍不住参与其中。这就是他的都城变成废墟的原因。

　英语寓言小故事（三）：

　Making His Mark

　A man from the state of Chu was taking a boat across a river when he dropped his sword into the water carelessly。 Immediately he made a mark on the side of the boat where the sword dropped， hoping to find it later。 When the boat stopped moving， he went into the water to search for his sword at the place where he had marked the boat。 As we know， the boat had moved but the sword had not。 Isn't this a very foolish way to look for a sword?

　刻舟求剑

　楚国有个人坐船渡江时，他不细心把自我的一把宝剑掉落江中。他立刻掏出一把小刀，在宝剑落水的船舷上刻上一个记号。船靠岸后，那楚人立即从船上刻记号的地方跳下水去捞取掉落的宝剑。他怎样找得到宝剑呢？船继续行驶，而宝剑却不会再移动。像他这样去找剑，真是太愚蠢可笑了。

　英语寓言小故事（四）：

　The miser and his gold Once upon a time there was a miser。 He hid his gold under a tree。 Every week he used to dig it up。

　One night a robber stole all the gold。 When the miser came again， he found nothing but an empty hole。

　He was surprised， and then burst into tears。All the neighbors gathered around him。

　He told them how he used to e and visit his gold。

　Did you ever take any of it out? asked one of them。 No， he said， I only came to look at it。 Then e again and look at the hole， said the neighbor， it will be the same as looking at the gold。

　守财奴

　从前，有个守财奴将他的金块埋到一棵树下，每周他都去把他挖出来看看。

　一天晚上，一个小偷挖走了所有的金块。 守财奴再来查看时，发现除了一个空洞什么都没有了。

　守财奴便捶胸痛哭。哭声引来了邻居

　他告诉他们那里原先有他的金块。

　问明了原因后，一个邻居问：你使用过这些金块吗? 没用过， 他说，我只是时常来看看。那么，以后再来看这个洞，邻居说，就像以前有金块时一样。

一分钟英语小故事演讲稿

　演讲稿是在一定的场合，面对一定的'听众，演讲人围绕着主题讲话的文稿。在当下社会，我们使用上演讲稿的情况与日俱增，那要怎么写好演讲稿呢？以下是我整理的一分钟英语小故事演讲稿，希望对大家有所帮助。

一分钟英语小故事演讲稿1

　in the matter of courage we all have our limits. there never was a hero who did not have his bounds. i suppose it may be said of nelson and all the others whose courage has been advertised that there came times in their lives when their bravery knew it had come to its limit.

　i have found mine a good many times. sometimes this was expected often it was unexpected. i know a man who is not afraid to sleep with a rattle snake, but you could not get him to sleep with a safety razor.

　i never had the courage to talk across a long, narrow room. i should be at the end of the room facing all the audience. if i attempt to talk across a room i find myself turning this way and that, and thus at alternate periods i have part of the audience behind me. you ought never to have any part of the audience behind you; you never can tell what they are going to do.

　i'll sit down.

一分钟英语小故事演讲稿2

　feeling of youth.

　no young man believes he shall ever die. it was a saying of my brother's, and a fine one. there is a feeling of eternity in youth, which makes us amend for everything. to be young is to be as one of the immortal gods. one half of time indeed is flown the other half remains in store for us with all its countletreasures; for there is no line drawn, and we see no limit to our hopes and wishes. we make the coming age our own.

　the vast, the unbounded prospect lies before us.

　death. old age. are words without a meaning. that paby us like the idea air which we regard not. others may have undergone, or may still be liable to them we "bear a charmed life“, which laughs to scorn all such sickly fancies. as in setting out on delightful journey, we strain our eager gaze forward.

　bidding the lovely scenes at distance hail!

　and see no end to the landscape, new objects presenting themselves as we advance; so, in the commencement of life, we set no bounds to our inclinations. nor to the unrestricted opportunities of gratifying them. we have as yet found no obstacle, no disposition to flag; and it seems that we can go on so forever. we look round in a new world, full of life, and motion, and ceaseleprogress; and feel in ourselves all the vigor and spirit to keep pace with it, and do not foresee from any present symptoms how we shall be left behind in the natural course of things, decline into old age, and drop into the grave. it is the simplicity, and as it were abstractedneof our feelings in youth, that (so to speak) identifies us with nature, and (our experience being slight and our passions strong) deludes us into a belief of being immortal like it. our short lives connection with existence we fondly flatter ourselves, is an indissoluble and lasting union a honeymoon that knows neither coldness, jar, nor separation. as infants smile and sleep, we are rocked in the cradle of our wayward fancies, and lulled into security by the roar of the universe around us0we quaff the cup of life with eager haste without draining it, instead of which it only overflows the more objects prearound us, filling the mind with their magnitude and with the strong of desires that wait upon them, so that we have no room for the thoughts of death.

一分钟英语小故事演讲稿3

　hello, everyone! i’m zhou kexin. today i am so glad to share my trip to changzhou spring city with you. it was a very pleasant trip for me.

　this nation’s day, i went to changzhou spring city with my parents. it’s the first time for me to go there. i was looking forward to it for a long time. my dream was coming true. after one and a half hour’s drive, we arrived. we saw a lot of old buildings.

　they are very special. the most interesting place was the zoo inside. there are many animals, such as, tigers, elephants, zebras and monkeys.

　monkeys are my favorite animals.they are our good friends. later i went to the children 's playground, it’s children’s world. i played happily with my parents. finally, we watched 4d movies, it was very exciting。

　how times flies! it’s time to go home. i had to say good bye to everything here.

　this was a pleasant trip for me.

　my speech is over. thank you!

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